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Camp: Human love opens us to spiritual love

I remember Valentine's Day in elementary school when we exchanged cards about love.

Over the years it has continued to feel good when I get Valentine, friendship or thinking-of-you cards. As adults we have many ways and opportunities to express love.

Too often we relate love to sentimentality or to romance alone. Seeking to be loved and to give love is one of the most innate impulses we have, and we share this with all primates. We need, want and seek love, and this is normal and healthy.

To love involves many things, including feeling safe when near the loved one, seeking the loved one's attention, and feeling energized by the interaction with a loved one.

Love also involves awareness of the loved one as a separate and unique person, respect and caring for the other, and behavior that benefits the other. Love also involves emotional accessibility and responsiveness. Looking a loved one in the eyes and reflecting back their emotion as well as sharing your own emotion is a loving encounter.

The scientists who study human love speak of love relationships as attachment. We develop attachment to our parents and children, and this early attachment conditions the way we relate through our lives. Attachment develops as we interact in caring and emotionally responsive ways.

Secure attachments enable people to be autonomous, to regulate emotions in productive and cooperative ways, to seek adventure, take creative risks and manage change, conflict and stress in productive ways. Experiencing love actually facilitates healthy and abundant living physically, mentally, emotionally and so



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